“Only look at someone else’s plate to make sure they have enough…”
I read these words a few weeks ago and had zero idea what they meant, but something about that sentence stuck with me over the next few days. Then, hearing a church member share her testimony helped me understand.
She shared how she was going through a rough time and decided to take her two boys to church. A lady there (whom we still go to church with) gave her her number and offered to watch her boys if she ever needed someone. This was literally their first time meeting. She probably just saw a tired mom and recognized that her plate might need a babysitter.
At first, I assumed the quote meant comparing yourself and wanting what others have on their plate. In the social media age, it is so easy to see what someone is portraying in their life and want what they have. It’s easy to see a mom who looks like she’s killing it—with a clean house, well-behaved kids, and homemade dinners—while I’m over here with crumbs all over my house, making it look like Hansel and Gretel have moved in, both kids in a screaming competition, and popping corndogs in the microwave for dinner.
It’s easy to look at a part of someone else’s life and want that for yourself.
But hearing this story changed my perspective on comparison. Growing up in Sunday school, we were always told not to envy or want what someone else has. But comparison can also show up as pride.
That sweet lady at church could’ve looked at that young mom and thought, “Man, she doesn’t have it together,” and completely avoided her. I’m ashamed to say I have done the same thing… at church.
We do this because, for some reason, we think we are better than someone else. We look at their plate and judge because they don’t have something that we do.
Relating comparison to a plate has really helped me think deeper about what comparison is.
When we sit down with a plate, we usually make sure ours has enough. In life, it’s the same. We are selfish. It’s me, me, me all the time. Then we might glance at another friend’s plate and think, Man, I wish I had what they had.
But my plate is full. I have enough. Why should I want what they have?
Then maybe we glance over another shoulder and notice that someone else’s plate only has PB&J crusts and nibbled-on food because she made sure her kids had enough to eat—even though she might be hungry too.
This was a reminder I really needed.
I hope it encourages someone reading this to give thanks for what is on your plate of life and to only look at someone else’s to make sure they have enough.
“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” —Philippians 2:3–4
“Carry one another’s burdens; in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” —Galatians 6:2 CSB
Kristie Fowler
Lean into Jesus Ministries
#kristiefowlerblogs