“Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.” Matthew 6:10
Have you ever had a song pierce your heart with such love and gratitude that you could not even form the words to sing it out? For me, that song is Hillary Scott’s Thy Will Be Done.
The words to the song spoke to my heart of the events that happened to my family 45 years ago—a time when we learned that God’s will was better than anything we could have imagined. The beginning of the song speaks of being confused and not believing that our broken hearts could be part of God’s plan. Such as it was in 1978 when my 29-year-old brother was diagnosed with cancer.
He was married, had two young children, taught the youth at his church, and was the youngest Deacon ever elected by his church. To say his faith was strong would be an understatement. We prayed for complete healing after the diagnosis. Stan had a large extended family of believers. Churches from all over the state where his family resided were praying for his complete healing. During this time, I could not go anywhere without someone coming up to me to say they were praying for my brother.
Our God is GOOD, so we knew Stan would be healed. We believed in God’s promises. Our lives had changed since the cancer diagnosis in February, but we had hope that only came from knowing Jesus. For five months, I lived out the lyrics that Hillary sings about.
“I know you’re good, but this don’t feel good right now, and I know you think of things I could never think about. It’s hard to count it all joy, distracted by all the noise, just trying to make sense of all your promises, sometimes I gotta stop and remember that you’re God and I’m not.” (Hillary Scott)
I was home from college that summer and Stan became much sicker. The treatments weren’t effective; he was in and out of the hospital. It was a rapid decline. We all kept waiting for his healing while we continued to pray.
At the beginning of the summer, My parents heard a sermon about God’s will in the life of a believer. About the same time, I read a devotional about God’s will. My parents asked their church, neighbors, friends, and family to pray for God’s will regarding Stan. From that point forward, all of our collective prayers asked for God’s will to be done. I knew a healing was coming, and once Stan walked out of that hospital room, everyone would see our answered prayers.
In July of 1978, the verse in the song that reminded me that “I need to stop and remember that you’re God and I’m not” came into focus. Stan’s family, pastor, and nurse gathered around his bedside. It was evident by his shallow breathing and his physical weakness that he was going to Heaven that night.
My heart was heavy, and to be honest with you, I could not believe God had turned his back on us. Where was the healing we had prayed for? Stan asked what time it was and then asked if we could hear him (he had an oxygen mask on). His voice was very weak; he began to pray. It was a prayer of thanksgiving. He thanked God for his salvation and his family.
I wish I had the words to describe what happened next. This is how my Mother described it in her journal:
“…after Stan ended the prayer, he paused for just a moment. Then he said, “I need something, but I don’t know what it is.”
Then suddenly, his eyes lit up, and the biggest, most beautiful smile I have ever seen came on his face. Then, Stan shouted, “That’s it! That’s what I need! Thank You, Jesus! Praise God!.
He then reached up and removed his oxygen mask from his face. “I don’t need that mask anymore”, he shouted. “I don’t need any of this anymore”. He attempted to get the I.V. out of his arm, but we were restraining him by holding both arms. He reached down and threw the covers partially off his feet, then kicked them the rest of the way off.
He sat up in bed and attempted to get up and walk out of there, but there were six of us holding on to him tightly. He was waving both of his hands high in the air and shouting to the top of his voice, “LET ME GO! I AM GOING TO BE WITH HIM. THANK YOU, JESUS! PRAISE GOD! DON’T TRY TO STOP ME NOW! I HAVE TO GO! I HAVE SEEN HIM! PRAISE THE LORD!
He was getting up, and it took us all to keep him in the bed. The nurse said, “Mr. Livingston, you can’t get up.” Stan said, “I HAVE TO GO! DON’T GET IN THE WAY!” Then, he turned his head around, looked at everyone in the room, and shouted, “WHY, YOU FOLKS ARE WITNESSING A MIRACLE. PRAISE GOD.” He was reaching out his arms for Jesus as a baby would reach for his mother. With that, he eased his head back on his pillow and did not draw another breath.
There was such a spirit of peace in that room that I will never forget. I pray that God will be glorified each time this eyewitness account is shared.
Yes, God’s Will was better than anything we could have imagined. He allowed us to see my brother’s healing and answered our prayers.
“I know you see me, your plans are for me, your goodness you have in store.”
Those are the words I know in my heart to be true after witnessing our miracle. Thy will be done.
Suzanne Byrd Ray
Guest Blogger for
Lean into Jesus Ministries
Stan with his family in 1978.
