Welcome our friend and guest blogger, Angie Conn Hotalen, to the Lean into Jesus Ministries blog space! Last week, Angie shared the following on social media: Her sweet sister, Jennifer, went home to be with Jesus in 2022, and her Mom passed in 2023. Angie beautifully articulated how grief presents itself in many ways and is always a process to walk through.
Angie’s words spoke to our hearts; we know they will also speak to yours. The LIJM team prays for comfort for Angie and all who are walking through a time of grief. Thank you to our sister in Christ for allowing us to share her heart with our readers.
“So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.” John 16:22
KEEP SWIMMING!!!
Grieving.
Grieving life that continues to change. Grieving the space that death creates. Grieving the quiet. Grieving the honking horn. Grieving the voices. Grieving the rides. Grieving the thoughts of what life used to be. Grieving the grands and great-grands, not knowing their hugs and kisses. Grieving those who have to hurt and miss. Grieving family living life in such an altered way. Grieving the distance. Grieving what the world says it has to be like in families after loss. Grieving the different shoes. Grieving the meals together. Grieving the laughter and togetherness. Grieving that old shoe feeling.
Grieving the drive up the hill. Grieving not being “lost” when we really always were. Grieving our trips away. Grieving a comfort zone. Grieving the hugs. Grieving the talks. Grieving the advice. Grieving the leftovers. Grieving the hand-me-downs. Grieving the loneliness. Grieving the connection. Grieving the new; grieving the old. Grieving the shopping. Grieving the heat seaters (aka heated seats). That was an inside joke, as I could never seem to say it right. I sure do miss hopping in Jennifer’s car and turning on the seat heaters. I am grieving the chaos. Grieving the birthday songs. Just grieving!
Sitting on this bench, just grieving—yet praising!
Some things I have learned about grief are: it’s there, it’s hard, it’s crippling at times, it’s evolving, it’s constant, it’s heavy, it’s life-changing, it’s necessary, and it’s no respecter of persons. It’s just a lot of things, but it’s always a testament to God’s hand moving us through this life onto our eternal destination.
It’s like the three little ducks I watched floating on the water this morning. Even when a little larger space appeared between their closeness, or when the current changed and one fell back or seemed to lose their way, or even when the waves seemed too large to continue on, they hung in there. They kept letting the current push them on through to their destination. Even though their journey might not have looked like they thought it would when they first began, the faithfulness of what was ahead and time unfolding just continually grew their determination and persistently gave them purpose. They knew that they would make it!
Eventually, they would all arrive! Yes, maybe a little more ragged, more tired and weary than expected, and most definitely changed—but stronger, wiser, more compassionate, more empathetic, and better for it all, from it ALL. But, until then, they just kept going, sticking together as they swam, knowing the direction might change, but the destination wouldn’t!
The destination was worth it all! God does A LOT in the grieving! He is good. He is faithful. He is always present! Keep swimming, and know He is pushing you home!
Love, hugs, and prayers for whatever you are grieving today, sweet friend.
Angie Conn Hotalen
Guest Blogger
Lean into Jesus Ministries
