My friend who knows me best (except for my husband) looked me squarely in the eyes and asked, “Can you honestly say that all of this has been good?
She’d helped me stay afloat during 18 months of swamping waves that threatened to capsize my spirit. Doubts about my purpose, fears about speaking publicly again, anger toward an abusive relative, stress of selling a less-than-profitable business, grief over my mom’s passing, conflicts with friends, depression due to the weight of it all convinced me that Satan was after me. He attempted to destroy my desire to live victoriously – sometimes, to even live at all. Maybe some of you know exactly what I’m talking about. I read the book of Job many times during those 18 months. Though I’d not lost all that Job, the poster child of suffering, had lost, I could identify with his emotional turmoil.
Through the help of God’s Word and family and friends who walked in the Spirit, I navigated the storms and found calm waters. Even though my sails were ripped and frayed, I discovered a new relationship with Jesus that completed my healing process. I began to see things from a new perspective – one I had wanted for quite a long time. Slowly, but surely, I began to appreciate the lessons I’d learned while clinging to Jesus in all those storms.
Then, just last month I overheard my husband telling my doctor daughter-in-law, “I’ve known Donna for 41 years, and I’ve never seen her this sick.” Sure enough, after a minor surgery, I had a setback that resulted in four weeks of headaches the likes of which I’d never known. Though this was a physical setback, my 18 months had taught me that this would not threaten the peace my soul had found. My mind, will, and emotions stood tall. Today, I believe that the power living inside me is greater than the power in the world. When I resist Satan, he has to flee. When I am weak, then I am strong. I am the head and not the tail. God goes before me and behind me. He is my Rock and my Defender. I am His and He is mine. No weapon formed against me will stand. Do you believe those things? Knowing them is one thing, but believing them means so much more!
When all of Job’s family, health, and possessions were restored in even greater measure, I wonder what his three friends thought. Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar had been miserable comforters. They tried to convince Job that it was his sin that had caused all his suffering. Job didn’t buy it. His conscience was clean. His friends couldn’t refute him, but they still chose to condemn him. I wonder. Did they ever humble themselves enough to celebrate Job’s blessings? Did a new desire stir inside them – one that wanted the same kind of relationship Job had found with God? Did they long for the trust Job put on display? Did they want what Job had found?
When people look at the way you handle topsy-turvy days, are they motivated to look more closely at Jesus? I never want my pain to be wasted. Something good will come from all of it. Of that I am now certain! Read how The Message paraphrases Paul’s thinking on the purpose of suffering. Can you relate to it?
“Because of the extravagance of those revelations, and so I wouldn’t get a big head, I was given the gift of a handicap to keep me in constant touch with my limitations. Satan’s angel did his best to get me down; what he in fact did was push me to my knees. No danger then of walking around high and mighty! At first, I didn’t think of it as a gift, and begged God to remove it. Three times I did that, and then he told me, “My grace is enough; it’s all you need. My strength comes into its own in your weakness”.
Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ’s strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so, the weaker I get, the stronger I become.”
So, how did I answer my friend’s bold question? I smiled back and answered, “None of this has been enjoyable, but it’s been good. It’s all good!”
Donna Jackson
Lean into Jesus Ministries
www.perfectionroad.com
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